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College Humor - Student Jokes

Our fabulous collection of interesting college jokes that may help distract you from that awful assignment you need to get in tomorrow!!!!

Category: College Humor Jokes about: student banking etc etc

 

Computer Joke

There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define 'great' he said, 'I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!' He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.


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Bumper Stickers - 1

Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.


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Vampire Joke

One vampire to the other : ' Let's go and have a drink. I know a cosy little mortuary just round the corner'!


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Law Joke

Q: Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?
A: To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.


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Random Joke

These are fabricated corporate slogans that would never have made if far if they entered the real world. Microsoft: 'How much are you going to pay today?' MTV: 'Loud and easy to spell. ' Saks 5th Avenue: 'You Could Shop Here if You're Poor, But That Would be Stupid!' Iguana: 'The other green meat. ' Nike: 'Just buy the shoes, you flabby spineless lump!' Daisy Air Rifles: 'Keeping kids off your lawn for over forty years. ' Canon Photocopiers: 'Quit calling them Xeroxes!' Apple MacIntosh: 'Hey, we thought of it first!' Radio Shack: 'You've got questions, we've got geek losers!' Professional Bowling on NBC: 'Oh, why don't you just go ahead and kill yourself instead?'


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Joke for Kids

Q: Why do Polish dogs have flat noses?A: From chasing parked cars.


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Parent Joke

Papa, who was Hamlet? 'You birdbrain! Bring me the Bible and I'll show you who he was. '


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Bicycle Joke

A math student who used to come to the university on foot every day arrives one day on a fancy new bicycle. 'Where did you get the bike from?' his friends want to know. 'It's a `thank you' present', he explains, 'from that freshman girl I've been tutoring. But the story is kind of weird. . . ' 'Tell us!' 'Well', he starts, 'yesterday she called me on the phone and told me that she had passed her math final and that she wanted to drop by to thank me in person. As usual, she arrived at my place riding her bicycle. But when I had let her in, she suddenly took all her clothes off, lay down on my bed, smiled at me, and said: `You can get from me whatever you desire!'' One of his friends remarks: 'You made a really smart choice when you took the bicycle. ' 'Yeah', another friend adds, 'just imagine how silly you would have looked in a girl's clothes - and they wouldn't have fit you anyway!'


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Bar Joke - 2

2 pshycologists met each other in a street one day. One said to the other, 'You're good today, how am I?


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Bumper Stickers - 7

This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To Me



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