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College Humor - Student Jokes

Our fabulous collection of interesting college jokes that may help distract you from that awful assignment you need to get in tomorrow!!!!

Category: College Humor Jokes about: norwich college etc etc

 

Funniest Joke

How did Black eye peas get their name?They were fighting over the Chick peas!


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Ethnic Joke - 2

What's the national anthem of Puerto Rico?'Attention K-Mart shoppers. . . '


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Computer Joke

10. You ticked him off once and your next phone bill was $20,000. 9. He's won the Publisher's Clearing House sweepstakes three years running. 8. When asked for his phone number, he gives it in hex. 7. Seems strangely calm whenever the office LAN goes down. 6. Somehow he/she gets HBO on his PC at work. 5. Mumbled, 'Oh, puh-leeez' 95 times during the movie 'The Net' 4. Massive RRSP contribution made in half-cent increments. 3. Video dating profile lists 'public-key encryption' among turn-ons 2. When his computer starts up, you hear, 'Good Morning, Mr. President. ' 1. You hear him murmur, 'Let's see you use that Visa card now, jerk. '


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Miscellaneous Joke

21 TYPES OF PEOPLE YOU MIGHT MEET IN THE MEN'S ROOM!EXCITABLE: Shorts half twisted around, cannot find hole, rips shorts. SOCIABLE: Joins friends in piss whether he has to or not. CROSSEYED: Looks into next urinal to see how the other guy is fixed. TIMID: Can't piss if someone's watching, flushes urinal, comes back later. INDIFFERENT: All urinals being used, pisses in sink. CLEVER: No hands, fixes tie, looks around and usually pisses on floor. WORRIED: Not sure of where he has been lately, makes quick inspection. FRIVOLOUS: Plays stream up, down and across urinals, tries to hit fly or bug. ABSENT-MINDED: Opens vest, pulls out tie, pisses in pants. CHILDISH: Pisses directly in bottom of urinal, likes to see it bubble. SNEAK: Farts silently while pissing, acts very innocent, knows man in next stall will get blamed. PATIENT: Stands very close for a long while waiting, reads with free hand. DESPERATE: Waits in long line, teeth floating, pisses in pants. TOUGH: Bangs dick on side of urinal to dry it. EFFICIENT: Waits until he has to crap, then does both. FAT: Backs up and takes a blind shot at urinal, pisses in shoe. LITTLE: Stands on box, falls in, drowns. DRUNK: Holds right thumb in left hand, pisses in pants. DISGRUNTLED: Stands for a while, gives up, walks away. CONCEITED: Holds two-inch dick like a baseball bat. RADICAL: Ignores urinal. Pisses on wall.


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Military Joke

A trooper asks a sergeant: - Is it true that man descended from a monkey? - Yes, troopers possibly were. But not sergeants.


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Funny College Joke

Why are women's breasts like a train set a kid gets at Christmas time?Because they were originally made for children but the father wants to play with them.


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Time Joke

What kind of watch is best for people who don't like time on their hands? A pocket watch.


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Humor Joke

All about smoking:Remember, smoking doesnt kill people. People who are trying to quit smoking kill people. One poll says 73% of Americans favor raising the cigarette tax. It's only fair. Since smokers aren't around as long as the rest of us, they should pay more while they're here. I quit smoking once for six days. And then they untied me. Trying to quit smoking can drive you nuts -- especially when you try to light your nicotine gum. Marlboro has a line of outdoor gear for smokers. They recommend you buy it a size larger so paramedics dont have to cut it off of you. The Marlboro clothing is very functional. The denim jacket has electric heart paddles sewn right into the lining, and theres a backpack that can hold a portable respirator. I stopped smoking and extended my life expectancy. My wife is furious.


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Burger Joke

What famous movie did the hamburger meat think of when they took it out of the freezer? They Fry Who Cam in from the Cold!


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Easy to Remember Joke

Why did the gum cross the road? -it was stuck to the chickens foot!



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