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College Humor - Student Jokes

Our fabulous collection of interesting college jokes that may help distract you from that awful assignment you need to get in tomorrow!!!!

Category: College Humor Jokes about: college 21 etc etc


Dog Joke - 2

What's a dog favourite hobby ? Collecting fleas !

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Zodiac Joke

Q: How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None. Capricorns can't afford new lightbulbs --- unless they're a legitimate business expense.

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Law Joke

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?
When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.

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Military Joke

The reason the Air Force, Army, Navy and Marines bicker amongst themselves is that they don't speak the same language. For instance, Take the simple phrase 'secure the building'. The Army will post guards around the place. The Navy will turn out the lights and lock the doors. The Marines will kill everybody inside and set up a headquarters. The Air Force will take out a 5 year lease with an option to buy.

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School Joke for Kids

The Diet BREAKFAST 1/2 grapefruit 1 slice whole wheat toast 8 oz glass skim milkLUNCH 4 oz lean broiled chicken breast 1 cup steamed zucchini 1 Oreo cookieMID-AFTERNOON SNACK rest of the package of Oreo cookies 1 quart Rocky Road ice cream 1 jar hot fudgeDINNER 2 loaves garlic bread 1 large pepperoni & mushroom pizza 1 large pitcher of beer 3 Milky Way candy bars 1 entire cheesecakeDIET TIPS 1. If no one sees you eat it, it has no calories 2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, they cancel each other out. 3. When eating with someone else, calories dont count if you both eat the same amount. 4. Foods used for medicinal purpose have no calories. These include any chocolate used for energy, brandy, cheesecake, and ice cream. 5. Cookie pieces contain no calories, because breakage causes the calories to leak out. 6. If you eat food from someone else's plate, the calories don't count. 7. Movie related snacks are much lower in calories because they are part of the entertainment, and not ones of personal fuel.

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Silliest Joke

BONN, Germany (Reuter) -- Thousands of Germans are keeping unfortunate surnames such as Kotz (Vomit), Moerder (Murder), Brathuhn (Roast chicken) and even Hitler, even though they could legally change them, a magazine reported Sunday. The German phonebook lists hundreds of people with the surname Faul (Lazy), Fett (Fat), Dreckmann (Filth-man), Dumm (Stupid) and Schwein (Pig), the weekly Focus magazine said in an advance release ahead of publication Monday. Unflatteringly named Germans said that they mainly had problems with their names as children and that later in life they had decided not to bow to social pressure to change them. 'Why should I have a different name from my father and grandfather?' said one Herr Schwein.

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Blonde Joke - 2

A blonde who got a fishing rod for her birthday decided to go ice fishing to make good use of her gift. Early the next morning, she got all her gear together and headed out to the ice. When she reached her final destination, she cut a large hole in the ice and dipped the rod in. Then suddenly she heard a voice that said: 'There are no fish in there'. So she moves to another spot and cuts another hole, but then the same voice spoke again and told her there were no fish in there. So she moves again, and the voice tells her there are no fish in there. So she looks up and sees an irritated man staring down at her. 'How do you know there are no fish there?' asks the blonde. So the man cooly says 'Well first of all, this is a hockey rink, and second of all, you're going to have to pay for those holes. '

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Fishing Joke

What part of a fish weighs the most ? It's scales !

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Joke of the Day

Q: What does the Bermuda Triangle and blondes have in common?A: They've both swallowed a lot of semen.

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Funny Famous Joke

Q. What do you call a dead blonde in a closet?A. The 1988 Hide-and-Go-Seek World Champion.

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