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College Humor - Student Jokes

Our fabulous collection of interesting college jokes that may help distract you from that awful assignment you need to get in tomorrow!!!!

Category: College Humor Jokes about: colage humor etc etc


Zodiac Joke

Q: How many Scorpios does it take to change a lightbulb? A: So who wants to know? Why do *you* want to know? Are you a cop?

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Police Joke

A traffic Policeman recently stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name. She said, 'I'm Mrs. Chadivaler Zuminskagia Ragretumunga from the Republic of Uzbetikan visiting my daughter in Columbia. ' As she finished speaking the cop paused for a moment and then put away his summons book and pen, and said, 'Well. . . OK. . . but don't let me catch you speeding again. '

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Bicycle Joke

What do you get if you cross a bike and a rose ? Bicycle petals !

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Old People Joke

A wise old gentleman retired and purchased a modest home near a junior high school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace and contentment. Then a new school year began. The very next afternoon three young boys, full of youthful, after-school enthusiasm, came down his street, beating merrily on every trash can they encountered. The crashing percussion continued day after day, until finally the wise old man decided it was time to take some action.

The next afternoon, he walked out to meet the young percussionists as they banged their way down the street. Stopping them, he said, 'You kids are a lot of fun. I like to see you express your exuberance like that. In fact, I used to do the same thing when I was your age. Will you do me a favor? I'll give you each a dollar if you'll promise to come around every day and do your thing. ' The kids were elated and continued to do a bang-up job on the trash cans.

After a few days, the old-timer greeted the kids again, but this time he had a sad smile on his face.

'This recession's really putting a big dent in my income,' he told them. 'From now on, I'll only be able to pay you 50 cents to beat on the cans. '

The noisemakers were obviously displeased, but they did accept his offer and continued their afternoon ruckus. A few days later, the wily retiree approached them again as they drummed their way down the street.

'Look,' he said, 'I haven't received my Social Security check yet, so I'm not going to be able to give you more than 25 cents. Will that be okay?'

'A lousy quarter?' the drum leader exclaimed. 'If you think we're going to waste our time, beating these cans around for a quarter, you're nuts! No way, mister. We quit!'

And the old man enjoyed peace.

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Just for Laughs Joke

Owed Two A Spell Chequer:Eye halve a spelling chequerIt came with my pea seaIt plainly marques four my revueMiss steaks eye kin knot sea. Eye strike a key and type a wordAnd weight four it two sayWeather eye am wrong oar writeIt shows me strait a weigh. As soon as a mist ache is maidIt nose bee fore two longAnd eye can put the error riteIts rare lea ever wrong. Eye have run this poem threw itI am shore your pleased two noIts letter perfect awl the weighMy chequer tolled me sew.

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Instrument Joke

Jacques Thibault, the violinist, was once handed an autograph book by a fan while in the greenroom after a concert. 'There's not much room on this page, ' he said. 'What shall I write?'Another violinist, standing by, offered the following helpful hint, 'Write your repertoire. '

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Insect Joke

What did the bee say to the flower ? Hello honey !

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Horse Joke

What happened to Lady Godiva's horse when he saw she had no clothes on? It made him shy!

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Ethnic Joke - 2

Q: Why were there only 49 contestants at the Miss Ebonics USA pageant? A: No one wanted to stand up and say. . . Idaho. . .

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Bus Joke

What have I got in my hands? A double decker bus! You looked!

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