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College Humor - Student Jokes

Our fabulous collection of interesting college jokes that may help distract you from that awful assignment you need to get in tomorrow!!!!

Category: College Humor Jokes about: back birthday cards etc etc

 

Joke of the Day

Outraged wife: Couldn't you think of anything better than coming home drunk like this?Husband: Yes, but she was out of town!


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Relationships Joke

A fellow in a bar notices a woman, always alone, who comes in on afairly regular basis. After the second week, he made his move. 'No thank you, ' she saidpolitely. ' 'This may sound rather odd in this day and age, but I'm keepingmyself pure until I meet the man I love. ' 'That must be rather difficult, ' the man replied. 'Oh, I don't mind too much, ' she said. 'But, it has my husbandpretty upset. '


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Bumper Stickers - 5

If you're rich, Im single!


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Law Joke

A dog ran into a butcher shop and grabbed a roast off the counter. Fortunately, the butcher recognized the dog as belonging to a neighbor of his. The neighbor happened to be a lawyer.

Incensed at the theft, the butcher called up his neighbor and said, 'Hey, if your dog stole a roast from my butcher shop, would you be liable for the cost of the meat?' The lawyer replied, 'Of course, how much was the roast?' '$7. 98. '

A few days later the butcher received a check in the mail for $7. 98. Attached to it was an invoice that read: Legal Consultation Service: $150.


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Naughty Joke

A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw an unusually beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized she was heading straight toward his seat. Lo and behold, she took the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out, 'Business trip or vacation?'She turned, smiled, and said, 'Business. The annual Sexual Education Convention in Chicago. 'He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen, sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting for sex education!Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, 'What's your business role at this convention?''Lecturer, ' she responded. 'I use my experience to debunk some of thepopular myths about sexuality. ' 'Really, ' he said. 'What myths arethose?''Well, ' she explained. 'One popularmyth is that African American menare the most well endowed, when infact, it's the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. ' 'Another popular myth is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of Jewish descent. We have, however, found that the best potential lover in all categories is the Southern Redneck. 'Suddenly, the woman became a littleuncomfortable and blushed. 'I'm sorry', she said. 'I shouldn't really be discussing this with you. I don't even know your name. ''Tonto, ' the man said. 'Tonto Goldstein, but my friends call me Bubba. '


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Computing Joke

10. 'Honey, why is an 18-wheeler from Amazon. com backing into our driveway?'9. One Secret Service agent is sitting on your head while another is slapping cuffs on you. 8. Apparently, your flame war with DonCorleone@mafia. com is about to turn ugly. 7. When you log on, your computer says 'You've got lawsuits!'6. You're suddenly getting more Spam than the Hormel outlet store. 5. Sotheby's says the Rembrandt is yours and that you now owe them $'71


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Situation Joke

Unable to attend the funeral after his father died, a son who lived far away called his brother and told him, 'Do something nice for Dad and send me the bill. ' Later, he got a bill for $200. '00


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Frog Joke

What did one frog say. to the other? Time's sure fun when you're having flies!


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Religious Joke

Q. Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible? A. David. He rocked Goliath to sleep.


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Vampire Joke

How does a vampire enter his house? Through the bat flap.



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